Hammering in my Head

Ever think the voices in your head just make too much noise?

"Hammering in my Head" by Garbage seems to tell the tale of playing a clear, calm individual while behind the mask all hell is breaking lose. How often do we do that? How often do we simply play to the crowd just do drown out the noise?

Do we really fear the hammering in our heads?

I'm stressed but you're freestyle
I'm overworked but I'm undersexed
I must be made of concrete
I sign my name across your chest

Give out the same old answers
I trot them out for the relatives
Company tried and tested
I use the ones that I love the best

Like an animal you're moving over me
Like an animal you're moving over me

When did I get perverted
I can't remember your name
I'm growing introverted
You touch my hand and it's not the same

This was so unexpected
I never thought I'd get caught
Play boomerang with your demons
Shoot to kill and you'll pop them off
BANG! BANG!

Like an animal you're moving over me
Like an animal you're moving over me

You should be sleeping my love
Tell me what you're dreaming of (all 4x)

I knew you were mine for the taking
I knew you were mine for the taking
I knew you were mine for the taking
When I walked in the room

I knew you were mine for the taking
I knew you were mine for the taking
Your eyes light up
When I walk in the room

A hammering in my head don't stop
From the bullet train
From Tokyo to Los Angeles
I'm leaving you behind
A flash in the pan
A storm in a teacup
A needle in a haystack
A prize for the winning
A dead for the raising
A catch for the chasing
A jewel for the choosing
A man for the making in this blistering heat

Sweat it all out
Sweat it all out
With your bedroom eyes and your baby pouts
Sweat it all out
In our electric storms and our shifting sands
Our candy jars and our sticky hands

Sweat it all out
Sweat it all out
Sweat it all out
Sweat it all out
Sweat it all out
Sweat it all out

Don't forget what I wrote you then
And don't forget what I told you then
And don't forget I that meant to win
And don't forget your ventolin
So a hammering in my head don't stop
In the bullet train from Tokyo to Los Angeles

Sometimes it's our own voices that make the most noise. Perhaps... it's easier than dealing with the silence?

You Look So Fine

Today's tune is another from Garbage. I just fell in love with this one when I saw the music video. Very simple, perhaps overly dramatic?

"You Look So Fine" has to be one of my "moment" songs. Funny enough how just about every time I need to test something working that's the one I end up playing. I guess it's all about looking for a happy ending of some sort?

You look so fine
I want to break your heart
And give you mine
You're taking me over

It's so insane
You've got me tethered and chained
I hear your name
And I'm falling over

I'm not like all the other girls
I can't take it like the other girls
I won't share it like the other girls
That you used to know

You look so fine

Knocked down
Cried out
Been down just to find out
I'm through
Bleeding for you

I'm open wide
I want to take you home
We'll waste some time
You're the only one for me

You look so fine
I'm like the desert tonight
Leave her behind
If you want to show me

I'm not like all the other girls
I won't take it like the other girls
I won't fake it like the other girls
That you used to know

You're taking me over
Over and over
I'm falling over
Over and over

You're taking me over
Drown in me one more time
Hide inside me tonight
Do what you want to do
Just pretend happy end
Let me know let it show

Ending with letting go
Ending with letting go
Ending with letting go

Let's pretend, happy end
Let's pretend, happy end
Let's pretend, happy end
Let's pretend, happy end

I guess letting go might just be the happy end. Seems to be working so far.

Milk

Todays tune just suddenly popped up. I'd put this particular song up there with "Hello" from Evenescense.

"Milk" by Garbage is an equally haunting track that seems to just gnaw on you. While there are many interpretations as to what exactly the song may mean or who it might be referencing I'll go out on a limb and say that we're all the "milk", but left alone long enough and we'll spoil.

I am milk
I am red hot kitchen
And I am cool
Cool as the deep blue ocean

I am lost
So I am cruel
But I’d be love and sweetness
If I had you

I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you
I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you

I am weak
But I am strong
I can use my tears to
Bring you home

I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you
I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you
I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you

I am milk
I am red hot kitchen
And I am cool
Cool as the deep blue ocean

I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you
I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you

I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you
I’m aching
I’m aching for you

I’m waiting
I’m waiting
I’m waiting for you

I guess I'm still waiting.

Only Happy When It Rains

Well it's officially the first rainy day of the new season. I've been waiting for this for quite some time and so finally here we have it.

So while totally off of the original meaning, here is, "Only Happy When It Rains" by Gargbage. I'm not looking for misery, I'm happy most of the time. I'm simply happier when it rains.

I'm only happy when it rains
I'm only happy when it's complicated
And though I know you can't appreciate it
I'm only happy when it rains
You know I love it when the news is bad
And why it feels so good to feel so sad
I'm only happy when it rains

Pour your misery down, pour your misery down on me
Pour your misery down, pour your misery down on me

I'm only happy when it rains
I feel good when things are going wrong
I only listen to the sad sad songs
I'm only happy when it rains

I only smile in the dark
My only comfort is the night gone black
I didn't accidentally tell you that
I'm only happy when it rains
You'll get the message by the time I'm through
When I complain about me and you
I'm only happy when it rains

Pour your misery down,
(pour your misery down on me)
Pour your misery down,
(pour your misery down on me)
Pour your misery down,
(pour your misery down on me)
Pour your misery down,
(pour your misery down on me)
Pour your misery down
You can keep me company as long as you don't care

I'm only happy when it rains
You wanna hear about my new obsession
I'm riding high upon a deep depression
I'm only happy when it rains

(Pour some misery down on me)
I'm only happy when it rains
(Pour some misery down on me)
I'm only happy when it rains
(Pour some misery down on me)
I'm only happy when it rains
(Pour some misery down on me)
I'm only happy when it rains

(Pour some misery down on me)
(Pour some misery down on me)
(Pour some misery down on me)
(Pour some misery down on me)

I'm only happy when it rains
(Pour some misery down on me)
I'm only happy when it rains
(Pour some misery down on me)
I'm only happy when it rains
(Pour some misery down on me)

Rain means summer in these parts... I love summer. So, I'm really happy when it rains!

The World Is Not Enough

Well, had no internet yesterday morning so was so backlogged that I ended up not posting anything. So here's today's tune, another Bond theme - Hey, what can I say? I liked sticking with a theme this week. Perhaps I'll keep it up.

You have just gotta love Garbage and Shirley Manson on vocals just blows this away (doesn't she always?).

"The World is Not Enough", but I tend to agree that's it's the perfect start.

I know how to hurt
I know how to heal
I know what to show
And what to conceal
I know when to talk
And I know when to touch
No one ever died from wanting too much

The world is not enough
But it is such a perfect place to start, my love
And if you're strong enough
Together we can take the world apart, my love

People like us
Know how to survive
There's no point in living
If you can't feel the life
We know when to kiss
And we know when to kill
If we can't have it all
Then nobody will

The world is not enough
But it is such a perfect place to start, my love
And if you're strong enough
Together we can take the world apart, my love

I feel safe
I feel scared
I feel ready
And yet unprepared
The world is not enough
But it is such a perfect place to start, my love
And if you're strong enough
Together we can take the world apart, my love

The world is not enough
The world is not enough
No Nowhere near enough,
The world is not enough

To give someone the world is at times just not enough. But you might as well start somewhere.

When I Grow Up

People have told me that I should grow up... but I strongly refuse. Heck, I might get old (eventually) but never grow up.

This song just makes me think of all the things we want to do, plan to do and the indestructible way we feel when so much younger. Or as I for the most part am still to this day (well okay, my feeling of self preservation is quite a bit stronger these days).

Reason I've picked this one for today, is that I was recently thinking about what would a 12 year old think of me? Have I gotten lame... or would I be my own hero ;) Ultimately I think that a much younger version of me would approve. I haven't yet joined the ranks of those that are just killing time before they die, but rather continue to do things my way. Taking anyone else along for the ride.

"When I Grow Up" by Garbage has always been a theme to my life, mostly because it's more about today... tomorrow well, that's a whole other adventure!

Cut my tongue out
I've been caught out
Like a giant juggernaut
Happy hours
Golden showers
On a cruise to freak you out

We could fly a helicopter
Nothing left to talk about
Entertain you
Celebrate you
I'll be back to frame you

When I grow up
I'll be stable
When I grow up
I'll turn the tables

Trying hard to fit among you
Floating out to wonderland
Unprotected
God I'm pregnant
Damn the consequences

When I grow up
I'll be stable
When I grow up
I'll turn the tables

Blood and blisters
On my fingers
Chaos rules when we're apart
Watch my temper
I go mental
I'll try to be gentle

When I grow up
I'll be stable
When I grow up
I'll turn the tables

When I grow up
When I grow up
When I grow up
I'll turn the tables

Don't take offense
Better make amends
Rip it all to shreds and let it go
Rip it all to shreds and let it go

I'll rip it up to shreds and let it go
I'll rip it up to shreds and let it go
I'll rip it up to shreds and let it go

Well, I just won't grow up.

No 1 Crush

Well, it's a Monday, and so another week begins. I've spent quite a bit of time on my own of late (through choice) in an effort to get some of life's filing done. I'm not really sure how that's going to be honest. But if nothing else, at least I've taken everything out and dusted off some of the good bits, looked back on some of the not so good and ultimately realised that I'm still made of sterner stuff.

I guess, I'm moving on. Today's tune from Garbage is "#1 Crush". This takes us to the borders of obsession, insanity... or as most f us know it, love. This was re-mixed for the Rome and Juliette soundtrack which really fits the whole theme of the song.

I would die for you
I would die for you
I've been dying just to feel you by my side
To know that you're mine

I will cry for you
I will cry for you
I will wash away your pain with all my tears
And drown your fear

I will pray for you
I will pray for you
I will sell my soul for something pure and true
Someone like you

See your face every place that I walk in
Hear your voice every time I am talking
You will believe in me
And I will never be ignored

I will burn for you
Feel pain for you
I will twist the knife and bleed my aching heart
I'll tear it apart

I will lie for you
I can steal for you
I will crawl on hands and knees until you see
You're just like me

Violate all my love that I'm missing
Throw away all the pain that I'm living
You will believe in me
And I can never be ignored

I would die for you
I would kill for you
I will steal for you
I'd do time for you
I would wait for you
I'd make room for you
I'd sail ships for you
To be close to you
To be a part of you
'Cause I believe in you
I believe in you
I would die for you.

I'm not sure about obsessive, but insane I can certainly do. Guess I'm just searching for my Juliette.

Push It

Todays tune I'm picking purely because of the music video. It's just so bizarre, but then again, so is life right?

I just love Garbage, they really stick out as being somewhat unique. I reckon Shirley has to be one of the best vocalists that I've heard in a long, long time.

I was angry when I met you
I think I'm angry still
We can try to talk it over
If you say you'll help me out

Don't worry baby (don't worry baby)
No need to fight
Don't worry baby (don't worry baby)
We'll be alright

This is the noise that keeps me awake
My head explodes and my body aches
Push it, make the beats go harder
Push it, make the beats go harder

I'm sorry that I hurt you
Please don't ask me why
I want to see you happy
I want to see you shine

Don't worry baby (don't worry baby)
Don't be uptight
Don't worry baby (don't worry baby)
We'll stay up all night

C'mon push it, you can do it
C'mon prove it, nothing to it
C'mon use it, let's get through it
C'mon push it, you can do it

Don't worry baby (don't worry baby)
Don't be uptight
Don't worry baby (don't worry baby)
We'll stay up all night

Don't worry baby
We'll be alright
Don't worry baby
We'll be alright

Don't worry baby
We'll be alright
Don't worry baby
We'll be alright

Don't worry baby
We'll be alright
Don't worry baby
We'll be alright

Push it
Push it
Push it
Push it
Push it.

Reckon that music video is about as disjointed as my life. Gotta love it!

Medication

No matter how much we would like it, there simply isn't a pill to cure everything. Then again medication itself often takes various forms. I really wish that right now, "somebody would get me out of here", but no idea where I would go.

Medication by Garbage

I don't need an education
I learnt all I need from you
They've got me on some medication
My point of balance was askew
It keeps my temperature from rising
My blood is pumping through my veins

Somebody get me out of here
I'm tearing at myself
Nobody gives a damn about me or anybody else

I wear myself out in the morning
You're asleep when I get home
Please don't call me self defending
You know it cuts me to the bone
And it's really not surprising
I hold a force I can't contain

Somebody get me out of here
I'm tearing at myself
Nobody gives a damn about me or anybody else

And still you call me co-dependent
Somehow you lay the blame on me
And still you call me co-dependent
Somehow you lay the blame on me

Somebody get me out of here
I'm tearing at myself
I've got to make a point these days
To extricate myself

Somebody get me out of here
I'm tearing at myself
Nobody gives a damn about me or anybody else

And still you call me co-dependent
Somehow you lay the blame on me
And still you call me co-dependent

Somehow you lay the blame on me
Somehow you lay the blame on me
Somehow you lay the blame on me

Think I could really use some medication right about now. But oddly enough I'm pretty sure somebody gives a damn...